While Covid-19 has put much of San Luis Obispo County on hold, major life events for residents–including birthdays, anniversaries, and holidays–are still occuring, even if their celebrations are diminished. Some San Luis Obispo High School seniors in particular are facing the loss of the ultimate marker of adulthood: their 18th birthday.
While birthdays and other cultural events are in no way the greatest loss due to Covid-19, they’re still a part of the drastic life changes we’re all facing in the midst of the pandemic. My own eighteenth birthday is in less than a week. It’s a strange emotional dilemma to lament the loss of the normal celebration I would’ve had with friends while simultaneously berating myself for being so upset over something as trivial as a birthday in the midst of the current crisis.
“I think [Covid-19] sort of downplays everything. I mean for a lot of people turning 18 is a big deal, it’s sort of like a milestone birthday, so not having it be really celebrated sort of makes it feel like it didn’t really happen. I don’t know, with everything going on it really doesn’t seem like a big deal. There are much more important issues happening in the whole scheme of things,” said senior Paige Lund days before her own 18th birthday.
Lund’s sentiments were echoed by all the seniors I talked to with birthdays during the shelter-in-place order. But recognizing the relative unimportance of birthdays and other events like prom or graduation doesn’t mean we can’t still miss them.
“I think [not being able to normally celebrate birthdays] is making us [seniors] sad that we can’t celebrate the milestone properly. I think we all just feel like we can’t do anything fun to celebrate because we can’t go outside and see each other,” said senior Lulu Dai, who will celebrate her 18th on May 7th.
The transition from childhood to adulthood is emotionally tumultuous enough without a pandemic occurring. Events like 18th birthdays, prom, and graduation are rituals that help us cope with the transition. But those external signals are now gone. There will be no big party telling me I’m 18, just calls from family I cannot see in person.
We nevertheless find creative ways to celebrate these events. Senior Greg Thom is planning on biking with his friends for his birthday. I’ll sit and chat with mine in our cars, safely more than 6ft apart. Senior Thea Ragsdale was given a video of dozens of friends saying happy birthday for her 18th. Creativity thrives in confinement. But even the most extravagant virtual messages, the warmest smiles from 6 ft away, or the kindest calls from family cannot replace the experience of in-person celebrations.
